Friday, June 27, 2008

Just one more. I really double-promise this time.

Just in case you ever decide to send your children to daycare, here is a handy list of suggestions your child's teacher would like to share with you.

1. Do not under any circumstances send a drink that contains red food dye. Even if your child isn't allergic to it, it will make him hyper and his teacher will despise you at naptime.

2. Chocolate pudding is NOT a wise addition to the lunchbox. That caffeine thing. Again, the teacher will despise you.

3. ONE blankie, please. The child will be sleeping (as long as you follow rules 1 and 2) and won't know the other nine blankies, pillows, and stuffed animals aren't there.

4. If you must send a stuffed animal, please be sure it is the silent type. The ones that talk and sing are cursed at naptime.

Are you beginning to see that the entire day revolves around naptime?

5. Lunchables can be your friend, but not the pizza ones. Your child's teacher does not have time to make three pizzas per child. And the cheese gets all over the floor and gets ground into the carpet. And the sauce packets explode if you don't open them just right. And all the other children watch the pizza-eating child so intently that they don't eat their own lunches. And that makes us late for naptime.

6. Please, please, PLEASE buy simple bathing suits. One piece. Two straps. It's enough already.

7. And spray-on sunscreen would make the teacher's life so very much easier.

8. And for the love of Pete, could you please get velcro shoes? These children are two and three years old. They're much too young for laces. Tying and untying the double knots in 26 little tennis shoes takes up valuable time that could be spent keeping the Houdini with Down's Syndrome from running into the highway.


And now you get a week free of tales from the pre-school. But only one week.

On the 7th of July I take over Leah's class of 4-7 year olds.

May God have mercy.

Be thankful ~


1 comment:

Mostly Sunny said...

Ha ha! Having taught preschool, worked in a daycare, and then taught Kindergarten for 8 years, I can totally relate. I was however, not afraid of messes as some parents were. I knew one mom who didn't want her kid in the sandbox, for Pete's sake. I gently reminded her that wasn't it cool how God made kids washable?

And as for my pup, that pillow had a hole from our dog Jen Jen (who recently died *sniff, sniff*) from when SHE was pup 6 years ago, so Allie was just finishing unfinished business. Besides, it DID make for a good video! :)